Don’t let hate or anger be your cancer. .

Don’t let Hate or revenge become your cancer..There are a lot of people out  so bitter about things that has happened to them and for many it might be justified

Is that how you want to go through life? With a cancer like hate that eats you up, consumes your every waking thoughts?are you thinking of revenge, how you want to see them end up or get even?

You need to let it go, give it to God and let it go it says “vengeance is mine” it wasn’t talking about you, it was talking about God’s vengeance. Everyone has to answer for his own actions eventually, its not for you to decide when.

While you are hating and plotting it is like a cancer growing inside of you, you keep feeding it with your negative thoughts, your hateful heart and it keeps growing, meanwhile the other person is going on with there lives not knowing or not caring about how you feel about them.

So the only one this is affecting is you! You have to forgive to move forward. I was raped when I was fifteen it took years of built up hate and anger but I realized I couldn’t move on unless I released it and as soon as I did my life opened up.

For the last twenty four years I was in a horrible verbally abusive marriage, but when I let him I left my hate and anger there, I realized I had a lesson to learn, I learned it it was now my testimony and I moved on, I don’t wish either one of them harm, I know that one day they will reap what they sow, that karma always wins and that it is not up to me all that’s up to me is to let it go!

So free yourself , get the cancer out of you, stop making yourself sick, let it go !

Being single in today’s world is a trip! Years ago when we were kids the most important thing was “is he cute?” Then as we became teenagers it was “was he cute and could he afford to buy us a slice of pizza?” ( hey I’m from New York pizza was important!)

As you got a little older it was ” was he cute and does he have a car?”

As we got into college it became about “was he cute and which parties could he get you into” after college things started to change we started not to worry so much about cute but about would he be a good provider and would he be a good dad.

Sometimes some of us made the right decision, some times not so in this faze of our lives when so many of us may have chose wrong we are now questioning ourselves and the choices we made.We awoke one morning to say

“is this all there is? What is my purpose?” 

And we go on a spiritual journey to find ourselves,  some of us me included read, go to classes,  get into meditation,  yoga , the gym and really looking deep inside to find what we want , need and who we truly are.

The journey took me four years , two years before being separated and two years after to find me , to be healthy and to be healed from all the hurt I endured during my  twenty four years of abusive marriage.   

It was only after that when I knew I was ready to date I knew who I was , what I needed and what is a deal breaker.

I need healthy,  someone who went through his own journey, is whole and out together,  I am not looking for perfect as I am far from that myself,  but I want someone that doesn’t party,  that believes in God and goes to church, that thinks their body is their temple and works to keep it healthy, that has a kind heart and soul.

Its not about the looks (okay not on the top of the lost anymore) its not about the money (been that done that,wasn’t happy)

Its not about the places they can take you or things they can buy you, its about are they healthy mentally and physically,

did they do the work to get there and know the hard journey it was to get to this place of peace and joy.

I know where I am at and this time I will not settle.

 So ask yourself are you settling? Then ask why?

When is enough, enough?

There comes a time when enough is enough, this applies to all areas in your life. When your relationship is enough, enough cheating, lying, put downs, you are done, you want out at all cost.

When your job is crushing you, you hate going every day , you are not fullfiling your dreams or Gods Destiny for you, you are suffocating it doesn’t matter how much money you are making it is not worth it.

What about your partying ways?are you drinking every day, your sick of waking up every day feeling like you got run over by a bus, you miss work, lay in bed, swearing you wont do it again, yet there you are next weekend pounding them down. When is it enough?

When you are sick and tired of being sick and tired that is when it will be enough ! When you cant possibly imagine going through one more day doing this, when you want better for yourself and your life.

When you start to love yourself and want to share your life with a person who cares about you, or you don’t want to end up alone and a drunk, or thirty years later with a gold watch for a job you hated.

I realized when my healthy mom suddenly pasted away, how short life is truly is and I didn’t want to waste a second longer being unhappy and being sick and tired so I made a change and my life is incredible! You can change your life when the day comes and you realize enough is enough then all things are possible. 


Sometimes the breakup is the blessing…

Yes I speak to people all the time and alot of people complain that they are lonely,  that they cant find someone and yet they prayed while in their old relationship for things to change. 

You were miserable, you hated your life and your partner so god listened and gave your freedom and yet you complain now. The breakup was your blessing! You need to learn things about yourself and your part you played in that relationship to be able to become better at making choices. You need to own what you did and know what you will put up with and what is an absolute deal breaker and be firm about them when going into the next relationship. 

You might need to learn to be comfortable with your own company or taking care of yourself there are all kinds of reasons you are alone, all kinds of lessons you need to learn before you are ready.

The last thing you want to do is repeat the same mistake you just left, I pray every day “please God let me learn my mistakes and never repeat them” I never want to be in that type of relationship again, where I cant be me, the true me, that I should change to try to make someone else happy. I am happy with me , I love myself, I know what I have done, I raise my hand to my part , I have worked on myself to try to be the best me possible,  I am not looking to change anyone else,  they have to do that on their own. That is their path, their journey,  I want healthy and together just what I am offering, I want that in return, so if I am alone for a week , a month or years I am good with it, I have incredible family and friends,  I have interests and things I love doing  and I constantly put myself out there to meet new people so when the times comes I will be ready! 

So don’t rush it believe me the break up was your blessing, enjoy it!