Steps to a healthier you

It’s not a mystery on how to live a healthier lifestyle, people make it seem like “ohhh I don’t know how to do it, I’m not a gym rat, I don’t know how or I don’t have time” Yes I hear that all the time,


So today I will unlock all the secrets of a healthier you.


Step 1: Get up and do something! Anything! Yes I get it you don’t have time, but somehow in the morning you can tell me about the five new Tv shows you watch equaling up to 5 hours?  But yet you you don’t have an 1/2 to exercise? Really? I was a night child but not last night!


If you really want it you would be doing it so to recap step 1 do something!


Step 2: Change your attitude, yes to become healthier you need to change your attitude, stop saying I can’t run, I can’t go to the gym,I am to heavy, too old, have a bad back, knees, fill in the blanks… heard it all.


If you read my blog last week I said I’ve worked out with a broken arm, broken leg, broken toe, carpal tunnel, hurt shoulder, you name it I worked out while it was hurt. You just change and modify until you get stronger.


This step is the most crucial as your brain tells you what you can and can not do, if you think you can do it , you will!


You tube the marathon runners whi collapsed right before the got to finish line ,their legs were like jello, they tried to get up only to fall over and over but so determined to finish they crawled to the finish line, yes their bodies said they couldn’t do it but their minds said oh yes you can!


3- Start to eat right , I was a Pepsi addict, I drank 2,2 liters a day! Yes you read that right 2, 2 liters, I ate junk , I never ate veggies, unless it came with my bloody Mary, hey I thought that counted,  the only fruit I ate was orange juice to take my aspirins with for my hang over.


When I became clean, I stopped drinking, I cut my soda to one can a day , then to 5 cans a week, to 3 and now I will have a can on the weekends, but bring a 2 liter in my house and its over.


So you have to know your limits, don’t buy Oreos if they are your weakness, buy a small pack, start small, I started eating salads , hated them but kept trying new things in them, I stopped going to the drive through,  I made my lunch and brought it to work, no it didn’t come over night and no it wasn’t easy.


If you want sugar coating read someone else’s blog, how many times have I told you , its not easy, if it was everyone would look like a sports illiterate model lets get real here!


But I am here to tell you nothing feels as good as when you accomplished something you set your mind to, you know you did it! When I crossed the finish line on the triathlon (yes it was a wuzzy one) I was so proud! Me, the person who was afraid and sucked at swimming, who hated to run, was crossing the finish line of something I never dreamed I vould do! The feeling was beyond words!


So that’s it folks, 3 easy steps to chanhe your life and become healthier, yup tha5s it! Surprised huh? Yeah so was I , your lying, there has to be more, I hear you saying, nope!


1 get up move , do something , find something you enjoy, bike, yoga, Zumba, running,  whatever just get moving.


2 change your attitude, get rid of negative people , say yes you can!


3 start to change your eating habits, cut of fast foods, eat healthier!


Sorry to bust your bubble, but that’s it!


So change your life, today it’s never to late, 3 small steps to a better life!


Okay get on with your life already!

Yes, I realize that, that might be a little harsh but there are so many people out there who need to hear it. 

Get on with your life already!!


Yes we all have things that have happened to us in our life, some of us worst than others but that doesn’t mean we are stopped in that spot and we stay thee.


Yes, your man cheated, he lied to you and broke your heart,  you take him back time after time, does that mean for the next ten, twenty or in my grandmothers case 40 years are we still going to have to hear about it every day!


Yes, your mother was an alcoholic, your father beat you, you were abandoned as a child and grew up in the system, is that who you are?


No, these are circumstances that happened to you, this is not who you are. These are the things that make you stronger, that change who you are for the better if you chose to make it that way.


Yes, you chose to become a better parent because your parent was so lousy,  you chose not to drink because you remember what it was like to pick up your parents off the floor and clean them up night after night.


You chose not to cheat and lie because you seen how it broke your grandmothers heart 40 years later but you chose something and you get on with your life.


You don’t spend the next how many years whining about it, giving life to it every day, stuck in that spot unable to move forward. No! You get up , you hopefully learn a lesson, because everything that happens to us teaches us a lesson if we are willing to look for it and then you take your lesson and you move on, that’s it, move on, end of story.


We all have problems, if you don’t I feel sorry for you as you have never learned any lessons, but if we were to sit around a table and each one of us would take out or problems and put them on the table, I guarantee you, you would be quick to grab yours back!


So let it go, its over, its called the past for a reason, forgive, and then get on with your life, how long has this been holding you back? Life is way to short to be stuck, start your life over from this minute, its never to late!

I love my home I love my life

There is not a day that I don’t walk in my front door that I don’t say these words,


 ” I love my house , I love my life.”


  Yes every single time, it never gets old, the feeling is the same time after time.


For so many years as I cried myself to sleep, I would close my eyes and dream about what my home would look like and feel like.


I would go through each room in my mind, I would picture the feel of the house, the furniture, even the paintings on the walls, yes in vivid imagination. 


Even when I didn’t have the strength to leave my situation,  I would buy things and hide them away, I would say “this is for my new home, a home where I would be happy and at peace” 


Sometimes when things got really bad I would sneak and pull out something from my future and hold it, I would close my eyes and picture myself there and for that moment I would be okay.


It became my escape, when he would scream at me that I was worthless, I would go to “my home” and see how it was going to be, he would be yelling and I would be gone, it was how I got through the last two years there. 


I made vision boards, I cut out furniture, lamps, tables, I cut out places I wanted to go, quotes I wanted to be, strong, independent, free. I put it up in my laundry room so I could see it every day and know this was going to be my future.



When I finally got the courage to leave and found this townhome, I knew I was home, this was the place I’ve dreamt about . 


The first night there surrounded by boces, exhausted from the move I sat on the floor and looked around and cried, I was finally free, here I was on my own, free at last! For so many years I dreamt of this and here I was, it was overwhelming. 


As I unpacked and went to yard sales and consignment shops, little by little I got it done and it came out exactly what I invisioned it, it is light and airy with a beachy feel, it is warm and inviting and I love it more and more each day.


So I am telling you this because you might be in that dark space, you don’t think you can do this on your own, he has told you, you are worthless, or can never make it on your own, I am here to tell you keep dreaming, have a vision board, buy small things you want to start your new home with, dream, dream, dream….


Never stop believing!

You can do it, you will do it! And one day you will write to me and say “I love my home” just as I do each and every day.

exercising is like brushing my teeth something I do everyday

I have been working outfor as long as I can remember, in high school I was one of two girls in the weight room (I giess that’s what happens when your a tom boy)

In college I took weight lifting as a gym course.


 I don’t remember a time I haven’t worked out, while I was pregnant until I was put on bed rest I worked out, after giving birth I bought dvds to work out toas soon as the girls were old enough to be taken to the day care at the gym I was back there, kids in tow. 


To me working out is like brushing my teeth, its something I do each and every day and if I don’t I feel yucky, just like when you don’t brush your teeth. 


I have worked out with multiple injuries, a broken arm, a broken foot, broken toe, shoulder injuries,  carpel tunnel, you ne it I have modified it to keep coming.


So when people say to me “oh I wish I had your body or its so easy for you, your little” it gets to me! Really is it easy to wake up each and every morning at 5 am when all you want to do is sleep? Is it easy to drag yourself to the gym when your body is screaming in pain? Is it easy when you have a million things to do in your head yet you block them all to give yourself an hour at the gym ? Or when my girls were little and kept trying to interpret me as I was working out in front of the TV?


No! None of it is easy , Hell if it was easy everyone would do it.

Let’s be honest, you have to work for what you truly want, in any aspect of life, your job, your marriage and yes your body and your health. 


There are days I don’t want to be herr , there are days when I eat that cake, there are days that I go to a party and eat and drink way more than I know I should and the next day I so dont want to be here but I come, I am so not perfect , I keep telling you all that!


But I say okay, I did it, iys over and tomorrow is another day to turn it back around. You can deprived yourself, you have to enjoy life and live, but you also want to be around, healthy to enjoy it as well.


Its a balancing act, just like everything in this life is, you eat right, you exercise,  you feel better, you look better but you also need to eat that slice of pizzza(okay I am a New Yorker after all) Here’s the balancing one or two slices and a cold beer, what is better than that? Then yhe rest of the week, you eat healthy and not say oh I fell off my routine so I will just eat everything in the refrigerator!


Balance people, balance not I was so tired I didn’t work out so I blew it,  this isn’t working I quit,No! You fell off okay, now get back on, no excuses!


I am just like everyone out there reading this, I work fulltime ( I am like a Jamaican, I got 3 jobs got to say it with a Jamaican accent..) I have two high school girls who dont drive I am taci service, I have a social life, bills, a house, grocery shopping and cleaning just like all of you and yet I fo it, there is no excuses if you want to change your life, none!


You can do it, make you a priority in your life, you know how in an airplane thry tell you to put on your air mask, then help your kids, well if you not well , healthy, in shape how are you going to help your kids? You won’t be able to!


So get up, brush your teeth and start to do something healthy, in 21 days it will become a habit and just like brushing your teeth , you will do it everyday

Does my happiness make you sick?

Yes I realized that some people might get sick of my happiness, they might think”why the hell is she always happy and smiling, life sucks, no one should be that happy, I hate my job, I have no one in my life, or my relationship sucks, my kids are not doing the right thing, I have to take care of my parents, my bills are over do, what the hell are you so happy about!!”


Do you not think I don’t have bills? A job that gets stressful? Kids that make me want to pull my hair out? A relationship, oh please don’t even let me go there! But I don’t chose to not look at all of the negative in my life , I chose to be grateful, I chose not to worry about what I can’t change.


I am happy because I know who I am, I love myself and I all of the small meaningless things in life are just that small and meaningless, thats all, I will never again let any of that effect my life or happiness. 


I don’t take one day, one second for granted, it is a gift to me and I kniw that, I want to be present in every moment. Yesterday as we were sitting in Riverwalk under the tress overlooking the river, listening to live Jazz music and feeling the breeze through my hair I was so very happy to be enjoying such a beautiful day! There is a song called its good to be alive that is how I feel each and every day.


I don’t understand how everyone doesn’t feel this way, God woke you up , you are healthy, you have a job, you drove her today, you have food, gas, friends doesn’t that alone make you want to smile?


We take everything way to serious in this life, we are so worried about what others will think, our status, what we have, how much money we make,  that we are killing ourselves trying to keep up, what you dont see is that millionaire that has no true friends, that is lonely and cries at night, that women in church in the fancy dress and purse that cant sleep at night because the bills are past due and she cant pay them, that person with the fancy car at work that parks it 3 blocks away because they are trying to reposs it, no you only see what they show to the world.


I know I no longer need “things” to make me “happy” I get true peace and joy just from being alive! Just from being one with God and the universe, just from spending time with my loved ones or by myself, there is a inner happiness that I can’t keep hidden, it pours over and out of me.


Yes, this is why I sing at the gym at 5; 30 am or I dance in the street,  that I have a smile on my face all day or a kind word for someone,  I am happy and I want to share it with the world.


So I have to tell you sorry in advance I am going to make you sick, probably each and every time you see me and I am not sorry! I am hoping that I may rub off on some of you and that you may be happy and grateful just for being alive today.


People life is too short, be happy!

I want to thank you for hurting me…

I was watching Oprah the other day and her guest was Shirley McClain, Oprah asked her who helped her and inspired her most on her spiritual journey.


Her answer surprised me, she said the people that had hurt her the most, they were the ones who helped her the most.


Wow, that was an “Oprah light bulb moment for me, yes I knew exactly what she was talking about!


It is when you are at your lowest, in the most darkest of places that you learn the most. You learn to rely on yourself and your faith.


While I was in the mist of pain, I couldn’t see the lesson, I, like all of you couldn’t see past the next day, the next minute, it hurt so bad that you can’t see past the next second, it seems like the pain will never end.


For me as soon as I was hurt I did the one thing I have done that had kept me going through all my bad times, I prayed,yes I prayed for the strength to get through this, to help me see why this had happened, to help me through the pain.


As the days go by and your pain turns into anger, you start questioning your self, the person you trusted and maybe some people even question their faith. Why did this happen to me? How could I be so stupid? if there was a God how could he allow this to happen?


Eventually you let go of the anger and this is where most people will do one of two things, either they will carry the hurt and pain and they will become untrusting and bitter or they will look for the lesson in the situation. 


I always chose to look for the lesson that God wants me to learn, what can I take away from this hurt and pain, that will teach me something for the next time.


When I got divorced and I should have gotten alimony but didn’t and I was hurt. Why was it that after all these years that he got away with treating me so bad and here he was winning again? How could this be happening, I prayed, I go to church, I try to always do the right thing, it was so not fair!


When I got over myself and tried to look for a reason and a lesson,  I realized that God wanted me to truly be independent,  to believe I could do this, to be able to cut all ties with him, so that he would never again have anything to hold anything over my head and yet again he was right , I am so glad I can do this all on my own.


So what lessons did this teach me? at first I couldn’t see any, was I was too trusting? I believed the best of people, okay I am too native. 


No, I realized that the lessons were what I taught my daughters,that no matter what, you don’t need a lying, cheating man, there are no second chances, you don’t need a man who is not going to treat you like the queen you are.


I realized that I no longer needed a man to take care of me, to make me whole or complete me, I got this and I like myself too much to let anyone ever again treat me less than.


I realized my true purpose, to write and inspire others, to be a voice, to call out injustice and fight for others that don’t have the strength. My writing has never been better.


And finally to stop and listen to my inner voice, to feel one with my God and the universe and to know when something doesn’t feel right, its not, listen and then take action.Pray and then be quiet so that you might feel his presence. 


To know my faith can and will get me through anything life is going to throw at me, I needn’t worry because even in the darkest hours I knew I had my faith and I believed it would all be okay.


Yes, these are incredible lessons I needed to learn and I am truly grateful, so yes I want to thank you for lying, for cheating and for putting me through this pain, for without all of this I would have never learned these lessons.


Today look inside yourself,look at the people who have hurt you the most and then look for the lessons and thank them for helping you through your spiritual journey. 





21 days to change…

Experts say all it takes is 21 days to change something in your life, that’s it just 21 days to change!

You can make something a habit if you do it for 21 days or you can break a habit if you do it for that long.


You hear about rehab programs all the time, they have 21 day programs to retrain your brain to live without drugs and alcohol. 


You can get over a person in 21 days if you retrain your brain, you can change your attitude, become more positive and  you can learn a new hobby.


You can also change the way you think about eating, there is no such thing as a diet, diets have a starting date and an ending date. You need a life style change and guess what??it only takes 21 days to change your lifestyle about eating. 


This is why I am so excited about this new venture I am on, beach body 21 day change your life plan! We are all going to learn portion control, what foods give us the most energy, what foods make us feel full.


We will also learn which exercises are the most effective,  how to modify them if you a newbie, support from others and in just 21 days (3 weeks) you will have a new attitude,  a new healthy habit and a new outlook on your life. 


I will be on this journey with you, because even though I work out everyday, even I can learn new things and I want to be able to improve on my eating and workout routine. 


You are never too old to learn something new, you are never too old to change your life, you are never to old to get into the best shape of your life!


I hope you join me in this 21 day journey to change our lives, its just three weeks to change your life. Statics say people watch 3-7 years of their lives watching television, but you don’t have 30 minutes a day to exercise or 21 days to change your life?


Stop making excuses…. I’m too old, too heavy, no energy, no time, too busy.. start making time for you and who you want to be, the best you ever!


As I always say its up to you, you are the change, you want to see. Make the decision, not the excuse!






Are you grown or what?

Are you grown or what? This is my question to a lot of my friends, I really don’t get it, especially when most of us are going into the second half of our lives.


The need to please is done for me , I realized that when I turned 40, I was done trying to make everyone else happy at my expense.


Yet ten years later there are still people I know struggling with this disease.


They are worried about what their parents are going to think or say, really? You can’t do this or that because your parents might get mad or disapprove? Your how old?

Who pays your bills?


Look I get they are your parents , but this is your life and you only get one, you have to live it your way, with your mistakes and your failures, this is how you live and grow.


You worry about what the world sees,  what people will think about you. I lived that lie for 24 years, my ex was so worried about what the world thought, we had to be “on” and perfect all the time, it was exhausting.


Yes, we all make mistakes, we all fall down, we all at one time or another look stupid or do stupid things but this is how we learn from our mistakes, we are human, its okay to fail, it makes us stronger.


People ask me all the time, how do I put my whole life out here for the world to see? I am human, I am not perfect by any means, I want everyone to see themselves in me, when I fall, when I cry, when I am not so positive, when I don’t think I have the strength to go on because we all feel these things, I just have the guts to put it out there so that people realize they are not alone and that you can get through it.


You can’t please everyone, it is not possible, god knows I tried for years. You have to be happy inside with yourself,  you have to do the best “you” can, you have to forgive yourself your failures and learn from your mistakes.


Your parents lived their lives, its time to live yours, those neighbors your trying to impress , you have no idea what goes on behind their doors, that put together person that comes to church every Sunday,  has so many dark secrets and demons eating them up inside.


Your trying to please people and look and be a certain way yet none of us is perfect an its killing you to keep this up.


People this life you have is not a dress rehearsal, its the real thing! Get over your disease,  cure yourself,  set your self free,  its showtime!

Yet another change!

I’m always writing that everyone can change and not be afraid of it, so yet again I am going to change another part of my life.


So many of us sit around saying “I wish I could do this or I wish I could do that” yet you never do anything about it.


 I write this blog to be able to inspire people, that no matter what age you are, what sex, what background or what religion you are, we all want the same things, we all want to (or should want to) change and that we all can change if we truly want to.


I know that you can change and you can do anything you want if you put your mind to it, if you follow my blog “change” has become my new middle name!


I changed my situation, got out of a horrible marriage, I started my own business, I started over with nothing, I recently kicked to the curb a lying, cheating boyfriend, I know about change! 


I know you all followed me when I first decided to do my first 5 k and I wrote how I hated to run and could hardly make it to the end of my block, but I started a “bucket list” and this was on it.


You were here when I started to train for a triathlon,  this from a person that didn’t even swim, I wanted to show people that even if I couldn’t swim, that I didn’t like running and that I was turning 49, you can do it,if you truly wanted something, you could make it happen.Bonus was I came in 3rd in my age group! Who would have thought?Surely not me!


 So recently I got together with an old high school friend Scott,he has always been an inspiration, he’s always excited and positive and he’s always been trying to help others as for as long as I can remember and here he was in the best shape of his life at 50 and trying to help others do the same.


We got to talking about how fitness isn’t a fad to us, its a way of life. Do you know how many days working out got me through a bad day? Oh yes some days it was the only thing I held on to, to keep me sane!


My life is my fitness,Hell I write this blog while I am on the treadmill each and every day! So all of this goes hand in hand. 


 God has opened up yet another door for me putting together my two favorite things I am blessed to do, writing and fitness!


I am pleased to announce I am now a Beach Body Coach! I am going to yet again walk you through another thing I thought I could never do, to get into the best shape of my life when I turn the big 50! 


Yes to show you life is so not over because you are 50, divorced and single, oh hell no! This is going to be the best part of your life!


I will show you and inspire you that even if you’ve been kicked down, you have been hurt, you have a horrible upbringing,  you feel like you have hit rock bottom, there is a rainbow out there and there is a pot of gold for you, but you have to want it, you have to want to change, you have to overcome the fear that paralyzes you!


Of course you know I will be bringing some of my friends on this journey with me and will be writing about it, the good , the bad and the cheats (oh please,you all know I am so not perfect and I love pizza!) But we will get through this together just like we have gotten through everything else with an inspiring word, some funny stories and a helping hand to let you know you can do this!


So join me on this new journey, it is going to be life changing, I promise you!


If you want more information inbox me or call me 954 600 0426