Why does it hurt so much

Tuesday Treadmill Treats

Why does it hurt so much?

Why does it hurt so much? Why can’t my heart know what my mind knows? Why can’t I realize that this will never work?
That we are too different, that the things that broke us up in the first place are the same thingsĀ that are still there today?

That yes, he is the sweetest, kindness,funniest man I’ve ever known, that it was love at first site since we were thirteen years old, that he’s treated me better than anyone I’ve ever met.That he loves me for me. That my heart soars when I see him or hear his voice. That I can talk to him for hours and never run out of things to say. That when we touch, when he holds me in his arms my world is okay, I am safe, my heart soars and bursts with love for this man. When he kisses me I forget the whole world and I only see the love in his eyes for me.

Yet my heart aches knowing we can’t be together, fearing that I will never find another love that touches me like his…
This love that feels like I known him for not just this lifetime but many lifetimes, that our souls are connected forever…this pain is so deep it sometimes takes my breath away

I know he will never fit into my world and I can no longer go back to his and yet….there is undeniably force when we are together, the room vibrates, when we are looking at each other, there is no mistaking it.
We both feel the love, we both feel the pain of being apart and yet we cannot change it anymore than we can change who we are and we know it, that fact breaks our hearts each and every time but we keep coming back like a moth to a flame because the heart wants what the heart wants even if the brain is telling it other wise.

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