Lifting someone up

Hump day Treadmill Treats

Lifting someone up

I write this blog to try to inspire others, to let people know that no matter how bad it seems, to be grateful as it could have been worse.

I am brutally honest, I let people see me at my best and at my worst and I never sugar coat anything.

I am also a friend to the end and would do anything for my friends but there comes a point when you must realize that you can’t help others who don’t want to help themselves.

Sometimes even if you have the best intentions, you can’t help and you have to walk away….
I wrote about this last week, about how it’s far and few that I cut someone out of my life but sometimes you have no choice and this is one of those unfortunate times.

I have been trying to help a friend who has a terrible illness see that her mental health effects her physical health, that I was worried about her and all the morbid post she had been posting, she seemed almost suicidal with the things she was saying. I reached out to let her know that yes it may seem dark now but to hold on, that maybe if she believed, if she changed her attitude, her situation would become better. That maybe she needed to talk to someone.

Well she ripped into me telling me I didn’t care about her, that I knew nothing of her disease, that I was a lousy friend and on and on.
I told her about another one of our friends who has a gamut of horrible diseases and is still the most positive person I know. She then twisted my words and put it out there that I was unsympathetic to her and her disease to all of “her” friends who in return also bashed me.

Look, I know who I am, I know my friends and family know who I truly am in my heart and soul, they know I would never look down on someone unless I was giving them a hand up. I truly wanted to help, but you can’t force help on someone even if you have the best intentions.
She will go on posting and feeling oh poor me, my life sucks, no one gets it, because she is getting something out of it, she is not willing to try something new and she is comfortable in the victim role.

I get it nothing changes when nothing changes…I can no longer try to help and get beat up for my efforts, so I am walking away… I am sorry I can’t do more, sorry she saw my help as a attack against her and truly sorry I am losing a friend but I will walk away knowing I have tried on many occasions to try to help and that’s all I can do…

So today my friends know when you did the best you could, when you reached out time and time again, you just can’t help someone who doesn’t want your help or refuses to change. Close the door and walk and walk away, you can’t lift everyone up….

“Be the change you want to see”

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The choice is yours

Tuesday Treadmill Treats

The choice is yours…

I am a huge believer in choices you can choose to be happy in spite of your circumstances or you can choose to be miserable.

You can choose to be negative or you can choose to always see the positive.
I talk about my friends Sue and Jill lot because they are my hero’s. They both have debilitating illnesses yet they are always looking on the bright side.

Sue has the trifecta of illnesses, plus a sick husband and mother. Jill is a single mom that raised 5 boys all while battling addiction and a disease, yet they both are the most positive people I know.

Their diseases don’t define them, they don’t rule their lives because they choose not to let it. They choose to be happy, they look on the bright side.
Yes, there are some days Sues fingers swell up, crack and bleed and are so painful that just holding anything is almost too much yet she will get on the computer and tell us even on her worst, painful days the things she is grateful for. That God woke her up, that she has her children, that it could be worse and she’s grateful it’s not.

Jill will still go out in the pool even when her MS is at its worst because she knows she has to move and her moving will effect her mental health which in return will effect her outlook. ..we laugh every morning laughter is the best medicine  …wow how amazing is that? both friends with debilitating illnesses yet always positive and happy in spite of them!

If you knew about all of their diseases you would think …isn’t that as bad as it gets? But no, they see it as it could always be another way and their happy it’s not.
Now, some people who are sick walk around each and every day saying poor me, I am sick, I will never get better, life sucks, you don’t understand, yugg another day, I am always in pain, you don’t get it….. you jump on everyone who tries to sympathize with you, that they don’t get how sick you are, that they just don’t get it….and then you wonder why you have no one in your life, it’s because they are sick of your attitude NOT your disease!

No, I can’t imagine being that sick, all the doctor visits, tests, medicine and pain, your right I haven’t walked in your shoes and I don’t pretend I know what’s it like, what I do know about is your attitude. ..and how that effects your life…how your outlook can even effect your health…. there are thousands of studies that prove your attitude effects your health.

So today my friends, take a page from my friend’s book, no matter how sick you are, no matter what life throws at you, no matter how many times you get knocked down…. keep smiling, keep looking on the bright side, be the positive light to shine on others…the only difference between a good day and a bad day is your attitude….

“Be the change you want to see”

Coming soon..look for my new book The blessing in disguise
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Are you living in the kingdom?

Treadmill Treats Monday message

Are you living in the kingdom?

Are you living in the kingdom or are you living in the world?

It is tough being a Christian in today’s world, everyone has something to say about your walk but you can’t worry about people’s opinion…don’t give people that much power over you, to control you.

The world will tell you your not a Christian because you have made some dumb mistakes or continue to make mistakes. You’ve heard it …I have definitely heard it.
“What kind of Christian are you?”

” A real Christian wouldn’t do or say that”

“Ha..what you go to church and still do….fill in the blanks”

Being Christian doesn’t automatically make you perfect…”Okay I am born again now poof I am perfect.” Yeah right!
There are some days you get up and you don’t want to do what’s right, there are some days you don’t want to hold your tongue or turn the other cheek… why? Because we are human first…

It’s by his grace that your saved..
Your thoughts are not like God’s  thoughts. ..
He love me in spite of the things I do….because of his grace and mercy, we are here… he knows we will never be perfect.

Living in the kingdom doesn’t mean your life will suddenly be perfect and all your problems will suddenly go away.
You are not perfect. …being Christian or going to church won’t make you perfect,  anymore than sitting in a garage will make you a car Please!
You will never be perfect. ..get over it!

“I’m not the light but I am a refection of the light….”

They will dog you out, they will ask you if you think you are better than everyone else  because they see your light…
Because we know who we are… and who’s we are…we not perfect but we try everyday to be perfect in his eyes…in his forgiving eyes…

You might ask why am I being attacked? Why is this happening? You did all that your suppose to do…so why is this happening?  You have to go through uncomfortable painful processes to get you to the amazing place God has ordain for your life…he has to equip you for the works of service that God wants you to do… to be strong…so that you have a testimony to tell…to help others, to tell others of how he got you out of the darkness into the light, how now your life is full of peace and joy, this is what your struggle was all about.

So today my friends live in the kingdom, ignore the haters, keep the faith, shine your light on everyone you meet, keep trying even if you fall short day after day…you are doing good works in his eyes…

“Be the change you want to see”

Coming soon..look for my new book The blessing in disguise
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Sometimes we need to let that door stay closed

Tgif Treadmill Treats

Sometimes we need to let that door stay closed.

I am a only child and for me my friendships are the family I chose for myself and I take these friendships to heart and hold them very dear to me.

I have had the same friendships since I was 5 years old and I still talk to these friends. Once your my friend, you are my friend for life, there is nothing I wouldn’t do for you, I am there through thick and thin, I have your back and will define you to the end. You never have to ask or worry about my loyalty, it will always be with you.

Through the years there were friends that were toxic and I had to let go of, friends that were too negative,  friends that I did drugs with and could no longer be in that circle, as I was trying to change my life. ..look I am being real here… sometimes you have to walk away for your own well being but there have been far and few in between that I’ve done that with.

You have to really be toxic or really hurt me to have me cut you off. I am the first one to raise my hand if I did or said something stupid and apologize for it. We might have difference of opinions, yet I still love you for you and will always be there no matter what.

So when a friend cuts me out of their life, I can’t get a grip on it, I can’t seem to let that door close, here I am banging on it over and over again asking wtf?

Did we have an argument?  No..did I say or do something so terrible that you would cut me out? I can’t figure it out but yet I am trying to bang on that door to try to fix it…

Maybe it’s not about me, maybe it’s their issue,  maybe I am just a reminder of it, maybe they shut out those closest to them, maybe they expect us to go down the same path, or believe in the same things and when we can’t, they shut the door in your face ..whatever the reason I cannot keep banging on a door that refuses to open to try to work it out…whatever “it” may be .

I try every day to uplift others, I try to be the best person I can be, the best friend I can be..but I am human and I will never be perfect…sorry,it’s just the way it is..either you can except that or you can shut that door again…
as I say every day, the choice is yours…

Just know that I am here, I will continue to be “your person, just as you will always be my person” I can’t make you be my friend as much as I would love to and miss what we had.

I will no longer bang on that door, blaming myself and demanding answers, I will take my own advice and let that door stay closed as that is your wish.

So today my friends, stop banging your head on a door that refuses to meet you in the middle, know you did all you could have, know that trying to be the best person you can be is enough for you…you can’t be everything to everyone… you can’t please everyone or make everyone happy as much as you want to…sometimes you just have to walk away with your broken heart in your hand….

“Be the change you want to see”

Coming soon..look for my new book The blessing in disguise
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You can let your thoughts confine you or define you

Thursday Treadmill Treats

 

You can let your thoughts confine  you or define you…

 

You are as you think… The secret…. The law of attraction, The bible, pick up any book now a days and the message is the same.

 

It’s all about how you think, If you think you cant do it, you won’t, if you think your situation will never change, it wont. You  dont have a shot in hell, you are already doomed before you even begin with that attitude.

 

I stayed in a verbally abusive marriage for twenty four years because he said over and over that I could never make it on my own, look how he found me… and look at the life I had now, that he had given me.

(btw he found me with my own salon, my own house and a brand new car, not living under a bridge like he would have you and me believe!)

 

But after hearing that for so long, I believed it, I became it,

I never thought I was strong enough to leave, until I started believing I was. See thoughts become things…

 

Every day I read self help books, I did things that made me stronger, I told myself I loved myself, I changed my thoughts and I changed my course in life. I did that! And you can too !

 

Do you think five years ago that thought I could do a triathlon? Hell no! But I did and I placed 3rd in my age group!

Now my thoughts say anything is possible! I will do this, I will be a New York Times bestseller author! These are now the thoughts that define me… nothing is impossible! I can do anything!

I am a strong, confident, independent, beautiful women, the same one I use to be but better because I am wiser!

 

I know who I am and what I will and will not put with! I now know that I cant make anyone happy, they have to do that for themselves. I have to do me and now know I can do the best me ever!

 

So today my friends I leave you with this thought…it’s up to you, you can either let your thoughts confind you or define… you which one do you chose?

 

 

“Be the change you want to see”

 

Coming soon..look for my new book The blessing in disguise

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The blessing in disguise

Hump day Treadmill Treats

 

The blessing in disguise

 

I just wrote a book called the blessing in disguise, the reason I called it that was because of all the things that happened in my life, all of the obstacles, all of my setbacks, all of the pain and suffering I went through. ..all of these things were really blessings to me.

 

Did I see them as blessings at the time? Oh hell no, I felt like I’ve must have done something so bad to have to endure all the levels of crap that was being thrown at me, that God had left me and I hated him, I felt alone, broken and defeated and some of you reading this today might feel like this….why me? Isn’t it enough already? I can’t take it anymore. ..

 

Yes, I’ve said all of those things and more…I’ve was on the floor crying out, not wanting to go on but I knew I was a survivor and you are too! Some days I had to get through, not one day at a time but one minute at a time to survive.

 

We all go through bad times, what got me through was my renewal of my faith, I had no where else to turn, so I let go and I let God.

See, these things made me stronger, the nah sayers, my mom included made me want to say oh yeah, watch me…

I kept dreaming of a better life, I envisioned it, I ate, breathe and put it out there…the life I wanted. I let go of fear, I started to believe in and like myself again.

 

All of these things made me stronger until I had the courage to step out in faith and then my life change in a miraculous way, these where all lessons, these things were my test for my testimony so I could help someone else who was going through it, to give hope to others, to encourage and to be a blessing to others, this is way I had to walk this journey.

Was it hard? Beyond belief!

But I wouldn’t change one tear, one painful moment because all of it made me who I am today.

 

So today my friends, these storms are there for a reason, so that you can know that eventually the sun will shine, bright and beautiful and that you will appreciate the sun because you’ve been through the worst of the storms.

 

“Be the change you want to see”

 

Coming soon..look for my new book The blessing in disguise

Selling on my website

 

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I am so proud of you

Tuesday Treadmill Treats

 

I am so proud of you…

 

Why is it so hard to say these words to one another? Why is it that so many people cannot be happy for others success and let them know? Is it because the spotlight isn’t on them? That maybe they haven’t gotten to where they think they should be and so they can’t be proud of someone else’s accomplishments?

 

I never look down on someone unless I am giving them a hand up…. I am as happy for them as if it was happening to me, I have no malice, no jealousy or no why isn’t it me thoughts.

 

When my friend’s car had broken down and she was in a tough position being a single mom and didn’t know how she was going to replace it, her uncle came and gave her his car. When she called me I cried, I was so happy for her, she so deserved it and it couldn’t have happened to a nicer person.

 

The other day as I was speaking to my first love, he was telling me about all he was doing trying to get his invention pattern and marketed and when he was done, I stopped and told him how very proud I was of him.

He had done all his research and sounded like he was there, ready to go with this and I wanted to let him know that I got all of his hard work and that I believed in him and his dream.

 

He told me that it meant a lot to him, just to have someone else to believe. I know that feeling as I remembered all the encouraging words he had given to me when I was in my darkest days and I knew how I held on to them like a drowning person holding on to that small piece of wood.

 

For so long I’ve talked about my book and when it was coming.

I had a few people behind me telling me that they were proud of me, the two most important people were my girls, that kept me going when it seemed impossible. Those 5 words

“I am proud of you” kept me going and let me know I was never going to stop.

 

You never know how much a few words can mean, can give another hope to keep going, sometimes a few encouraging words can literally save a person’s life.

 

So today my friends, tell someone your proud of them, that you believe in them, that you know that they can do it….you can literally change a life.

 

 

“Be the change you want to see”

 

Coming soon..look for my new book The blessing in disguise

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Voice activation

Treadmill Treats Monday message

 

Voice activation

 

You need to know your voice can activate things…amazing things…

The first time voice activation happened was when

God spoke light into darkness…”Let there be light ” and there was…

 

There are other times in the bible that tells you how powerful your words are…

 

“My word shall not return empty..but it shall accomplish that which I have purpose ”

 

“Death and life are in the power of your tongue ”

 

“When you don’t have doubt in your heart but believes what he says, it will come to pass…”

 

Think back to how many words are still haunting you today? That still have power over your life…

“Your never be anything ”

 

“Without me…your be nothing ”

 

“What? You can’t possibly do that! Are you crazy? That  dream will never happen ”

 

How many of these words are holding you back? You believe them and you can’t break free…even if they were spoken to you 30 years ago, they are just as powerful today as when they were first spoken.

 

But yet you don’t realize that power of your words are amazing, whether you believe it or not…your words are powerful.

 

Speak what you want to see happen …speak it in the universe. ..speak it as if it has already come to pass.

It will happen, tell yourself you can do  this, you are beautiful, smart, independent. Speak that dream you have inside of you, cancel out all the other words you keep replaying in your head, replace them with positive words.

 

If reading the bible is not for you read the book The Secret, it is just an updated version of the bible, resp what you sow, karma, what you put out will come back, speak it into existence…all of these came from the bible, it worked then, it works now….

 

So today my friends remember words can cut you down if you let them, they can also change your life if you believe, the power is all yours….

 

“Be the change you want to see”

 

Coming soon..look for my new book The blessing in disguise

Selling on Amazon or my website

 

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My,you have big balls behind the computer screen

Tgif Treadmill Treats

 

My, you have big balls behind that computer screen

 

Technology is amazing, look I write my blog while I’m on the treadmill, how great is that?

I can keep in touch with friends and family all around the world, I can have my message touch thousands, even one day millions of people, yes today’s technology is wonderful.

 

With every good comes some bad and technology is no different, all of a sudden some people get behind a computer screen and they become a critic, look at what I wrote about yesterday, how random people tore into the singer Pink about how they thought she was fat. They made such horrible comments, comments mind you that they would never have enough balls to say in her face.

 

Same thing with today’s on line dating, these men say things they would never dream of saying in person but because you are “anonymous” all of a sudden you grow a big pair!

 

Would you really have enough guts to call a woman baby,sexy, delicious just meeting them, probably not, would you ask her what underwear she was wearing on the first date ,yeah right not unless you wanted to get slapped, no, but boy oh boy you got some things to say while behind the safety of that screen!

 

They feel protected, like all of sudden these meek, shy people sit behind this screen and they become different people and they think it’s okay to spew  hateful things to others,you get up on their invisible soap box and say and do things they would never have the guts to do otherwise.

 

I am me, behind the screen or in your face, I tell it like it is, I wouldn’t say something on here, that I wouldn’t be afraid to say to you. I have feelings and I know others do as well, so I think about how would that feel if someone said it to me.

 

So today my friends this is a message to all of the people out there behind their computer screens…grow a real set, a big set while your at it, not just the pretend set you put on when you sit behind the screen. It is then you will be real.

 

“Be the change you want to see”

 

Coming soon..look for my new book “The blessing in disguise”

Selling on my website:

 

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Did you really just say that?

Thursday Treadmill Treats

 

Did you really just say that?

 

Yesterday I read a article about the singer Pink, she was at a award dinner to honor her friend who had done many wonderful things to help cancer survivors.

 

She looked beautiful in a black dress and happy to be there with her husband celebrating her friend accomplishments.

All of a sudden, all these people started to post such horrible things about her, like how fat she was, that she was a pig, that she should worry about losing weight instead of going out partying.

 

I was blown away, how could people say such mean and cruel things to another human being? What is wrong with you and society that you would think it’s okay to do something like that?

 

Besides the fact that she is in phenomenal shape, but if you ever saw her perform, you would be amazed. She not only sings and puts on a show, she flys through the air on wires, she does acrobatics on fabric hanging from the ceiling, upside down, all while singing and holding her notes. It’s mind blowing to see her strength up there.

 

While she’s no anorexia victim, she certainly isn’t overweight by any means, she is definitely muscular and fit. But this is not the point, even if she had put on weight and Hell we all do from time to time, who are you to stand there, point your finger and judge another person? What is wrong in your world that you could care less about someone else’s feelings and say such things?

 

I have to say Pink was incredibly gracious when she answered the many people that posted such negative things. She said thank you for your concern, that she thought the dress looked more flattering at home but how she looked and felt beautiful in it. That she was glad she no longer needed or cared about anyone else option of her was. She knew her self worth and loved herself. Big message to many young woman today, I am a bigger fan now than I was before.

 

So today my friends,know your self worth in spite of the cruel things people may say, there will always be haters, there will always be people out there that you will say “did you really just say that?”  Know that you can and will rise above it, be your own biggest fan.

 

“Be the change you want to see…”

 

Coming soon..look for my new book The blessing in disguise

Selling on Amazon or my website

 

Www.treadmilltreats.com

 

My weekly Youtube page:

 

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