To my mom….

Treadmill Treats Monday message

To my mom…

Yesterday was mother’s day and 4 years since I have lost my mom.
There is not a day that goes by that I don’t miss her but on mother’s day it hits you that much harder as everyone is celebrating their mother and yours is no longer here to call, to send flowers to, to take out to dinner and if you could have one more mother’s day with her you would give anything….

Being a mother doesn’t come with a manual, you do what you were taught, you wing it, and you pray you are doing the right thing. You have no idea if they are listening or if your doing it right, you are free styling, big time.

My mom came from a generation that didn’t “talk”about their feelings, a stop whining, pull up your boot straps generation. So we didn’t talk about deep things, we talked about surface things, the weather, the neighbors, life in general. I wanted my girls to talk to me, tell me about their troubles with girls, with boyfriends, with how they truly feel. I am open and honest with them and I know they are that way with me.

I loved my mom and learned so many things from her and her character, that I have passed on to my girls. 

To own what you do no matter what it is, to be compassionate to others less fortunate, to have a big heart, to be a hard worker, to feel blessed no matter how hard the situation is. The biggest thing I learned from her is that you can change and learn from your mom, the things she couldn’t or didn’t do in your life.

Her own mom was cold, mean, a man hater and was the most negative person I ever met. She spoke bad about my grandfather at every turn, she cursed all men, she hated the world for her circumstances and never stopped complaining about it.

My mom decided she wasn’t going to be like her, she and my dad had the best divorce, she never spoke a bad word about him, she was always positive and kind and never complained no matter how bad it got and it got bad, we were poor, really poor.

She decided that she wasn’t going to do that to me and she changed what she was taught.
I decided I was going to talk to my girls and I chose to change what I was taught.

Just because your a “mother ” doesn’t mean you do everything right, and it definitely doesn’t mean you have to keep the generational teachings going when they clearly don’t work,  you chose to try to do better, be better. ..and one day maybe my girls will look back at what I did and they will chose to do something better than I did with their own children.

So I would like to thank my mother for all the wonderful lessons she taught me but the biggest one was to chose your life and how you want to live it.
Make the best out of any situation, it’s up to you…and look at that, here I am passing forward her words to all of you…

So today my friends, honor your mother’s, tell them you love them, bring then flowers while they can still smell them, learn their lessons and know you can chose the ones that work for you and your family because we are all just winging it.

“Be the change you want to see”

Coming soon..look for my new book The blessing in disguise
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