3 years of freedom

Treadmill Treats Monday Message

 

3 years of freedom

 

Today is the anniversary of my freedom, three years ago today I got divorced.

I have to tell you, it has been the best three years of my life.

 

If I would have known how truly happy and at peace I would be feeling today, I’ve would have done this years and years ago.

 

What has the fear in your life has kept you from doing? Fear will keep you hostage in a bad marriage, in a lousy job, with friends that no longer suit you, yes, fear will keep you locked up better than any maximum security prison will.

 

I was afraid that I couldn’t make it, being a single mom of two, not being on my own for 24 years, believing all that he spoke about me, that I was useless, stupid, that I couldn’t make it without him and that I was stuck in this verbally abusive marriage forever.

 

So many of you out there may be in this position right now, your scared, you have no self esteem, you have children you need to care for. I know what your going through and I am here to tell you that you can do it, you can be happy, you can stop living like your walking on eggshells each and every day. There is a big, beautiful world out there and its yours if you will only step out and let go of fear.

 

Last night I was talking to my boo and somehow we got talking about all that I did while in this marriage.

I cooked, I cleaned, did laundry.

I made sure dinner was on the table every night at 6,

I cleaned the yard, the pool, the sprinklers, I fixed everything that broke.

 

I worked part time, I took care of our business and all the office work, I did hair at night. I was room mom and PTA mom, I was at every function my girls had, every sport, I was the milk and cookies mom after school, the weekend mom that took them to every park,  bike riding, surfing, skate boarding, all while every morning getting up at 6 am to go to the gym 5 days a week.

 

I was doing this all on my own anyway why couldn’t I be happy while I was doing it without him? Your reading this and thinking yes, I do all of that…yes, you do yet your miserable, you cry yourself to sleep and you pray for a different life.

 

You have the power to change it all, will it be a bed of roses? Oh hell no, it will be tough, it will be scary but you will be happy, you will feel a peace like no other, a sense of accomplishment. You will come home to “your” home, there will be no yelling, no put downs, no drama, because it is your life now and you get to chose how to live it.

You are in control of your own happiness and there is nothing like that feeling.

 

How did I do it? I read books, I started liking myself again, I envisioned and dreamed about what my life would be like. I made vision boards, I  joined self help groups but what changed it all for me was I prayed, I gave it all over to God, I prayed and let him worry. I stepped out in faith, no money, just starting a new business, just divorced lots of pressure right? No…I knew he would take care of me and he did and continues to do so.

 

I was going over my bills last night and I don’t know how I do it…but God…

I get to travel, I have been blessed with so many things and so many incredible people in my life, my boo, an amazing Church, Pastor and Church family. My girls are good and healthy, my life is more than I dreamed it could be!

 

So today my friends remember…believe in yourself, believe that you can do it, step out on faith, let go of the fear, you are stronger than you know.

Life is too short to be anything but happy…

Nothing is impossible if you believe….

 

“Be the change you want to see”

 

“And just when the caterpillar thought his life over…he turned into a beautiful butterfly”

 

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