The month is over but Domestic violence goes on

The month is over but Domestic violence goes on


October is National Domestic Violence Awareness Month but just because October is over doesn’t it mean domestic violence is suddenly going to disappear. Domestic violence goes on in this country every second of every day. This is why this is my purpose, it’s to teach everyone out there that is dealing with domestic violence, that you don’t have to, to know you can change, you can walk away, you can learn your worth and how you let other people treat you.


So today on the last day of October I’d like to let everyone know that this is an ongoing thing and for me this is my life purpose so I will keep talking about domestic violence, just because the month is over doesn’t mean I am done.

I’ve even decided to start doing videos about knowing your worth and the things that we discussed in my blog so that you get to see the face behind the blog and if you can’t feel my passion through my writing,(I can’t see how that is possible) you will be able to in my videos.


I have to tell you, as I am real as hell and never hold back, that I thought I had worked out all of my issues from being in a verbally abusive marriage for 24 years, I took time, I read books, I went to support meetings, I spent time with myself owning my own shit and forgiving him for his.


I thought I was good, but little did I know there was still some lasting residue from this, as I’ve learned this in the last few years with the guys I’ve been dating.


I still don’t know my worth, I see the red flags but I still make excuses instead of running as soon as I see them. I allow them to treat me the way I tell my queens to never accept, I am still broken and still need these lessons to make me whole.


It’s okay to screw up, hell I do it all the time, these screw ups teach you lessons, if you let them. They teach you your strength, sometimes you may slip back into your old ways, but as long as you realize it, as long as your constantly trying to improve and change, it’s all these  lessons that will be moving you forward.


I am hard headed, I need to screw up not once but many times before I get it.

I am always trying to give people the benefit of the doubt, always trying to see the good in them, make excuses for their lousy behavior even when it’s clearly all on them. I still go into it must be me and something I did mode, that willingness to make someone love me, to do whatever it takes to make a person happy even if it means sacrificing my own happiness.


Yes, I am a work in progress and every day I am learning my own self worth, every day I learn something about myself and the issues I still have.

If your reading this and you think you don’t have issues, lasting residue from your childhood, your past relationships, from issues you chose not to deal with, you are lying to yourself. We all are broken in some way or another but the only way to fix this is to be real, to own it, to speak it, speak about it, let it go, open that door…

Today’s the perfect day for that, it’s Halloween, open the door let those skeletons out, clear it all out!


You can’t change what you don’t acknowledge, so do it, acknowledge it, own it, deal with it, learn your lesson and then let it go.

I am acknowledging my weakness, my points that I still need to work on and I am putting it out here for you and the world to see

(Now that’s scary, I’m just asking you to own it to yourselves)


Let’s walk this path together, I am here learning just like you, I just chose to share all of it with you and the world because we will never grow if we are stuck in fear, if we don’t see the hope of someone who is going through the same thing we are, that gives us the courage to change.

“If they can do it, then I can do it”

That feeling of knowing your not alone, someone else walked your path and made it out.


So today my friends remember, yes you can get out of a bad situation, you can walk away from domestic violence but until your real with yourself, until you keep addressing and learning lessons, until you finally know your self worth and what you absolutely won’t put up with or make excuses for you are still stuck there.


Domestic violence is not just a month, it’s not just  about getting out, it’s about teaching others their value, its about showing the next generation change, its about uplifting each other and it’s about the constant change within ourselves.


“Be the change you want to see”


“And just when the caterpillar thought his life over…he turned into a beautiful butterfly”


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