Keeping the faith through the storms
I am a positive person, I am that glass is half full person and for the most part I am always like this but I am human and that part sometimes gets down, I yell out why me? When it feels like the world is coming at me.
I am a single mom, I work 3 jobs, I am up at 5 am and at the gym at 5:30 to get on this treadmill and write this blog. I sometimes don’t get home until 9 pm, I am tired all the time and I know my single moms can attest to this, it’s a tough life.
My oldest lost her job and I am now paying all her bills as well as helping out my younger one with stuff, I have to take care of my home, repairs and all the yard work.
This would put alot of stress on anyone and it has taken it’s toll on me, lately I am short, I have little patience and sometimes get angry more than I would normally.
But then life decides to throw more at you, just when your on the ledge and this week it did just that. Someone yet again stole my identity, my bank screwed up and paid my mortgage payment twice in one week and with the guy I work for falling behind way too much with paying me, it pushed me off the ledge, it was enough for me to lose it.
I cried, I cursed, I asked why? Didn’t I have enough crap in one lifetime? Where was my season everyone keeps telling me about and then to top it off I have no love life to speak of, no one to cry in their shoulder or talk about things to.
Not only that, it seems like every date I have is one from hell…now come on God what’s the deal?
Yes, I am Christian but that 2% like one of my girlfriend’s always says isn’t and so I doubt, I cry and I curse…sorry I am real and I tell it like it is.
I cried the whole time while on the phone trying to get my problems solved with the bank, the mortgage company, the creditors and the police. Yes, just what I wanted to deal with after a long week of pulling doubles every day…NOT!
When my brain finally turned into mush and my head hurt from crying, I went and took a long hot shower, did some more crying and had some beers before crying myself to sleep.
The following morning, when I awoke I started praying, I was going to give this to God because I could not handle this on my own. I was going to pray and let God worry, as this was too much for me.
I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that things are coming for me, my season, the man God has for me, my New York Times best selling books, my international blog and my women of faith tour. Yes, I know God is going to cover me and my girls with favor beyond belief, just as he has done in the past.
I just have to hold on, I have to just believe, to have faith and know it’s coming on his time not mine.
I need to know the devil comes at you the hardest when your breakthrough is coming. This is just another knock down for me to overcome, to test my strength, my faith, this is a practice fight leading up to the heavy weigh title belt.
I know this is more test for my testimony, so I can praise his name even more, tell others of his goodness, even when I am crying so much I can’t see through the storms, even when I want to quit, I remember all he’s done for me and it gives me the strength to go on.
So today my friends, remember, yes, it’s bad right now, you may not be able to see through the clouds, things may be coming at you from all directions but don’t give up, cry, have a pity party, yell and scream, have a few drinks and sleep it off, for as God says in the bible
“For His anger is but for a moment,
His favor is for a lifetime;
Weeping may last for the night,
But a shout of joy comes in the morning”
It will be alright in the morning, God’s got this, all we need to do is let go, have “crazy” faith like my Bishop Henry Fernandaz says and hold on tight…it will be alright.
Keep the faith through the storms….
“Be the change you want to see”
“And just when the caterpillar thought his life over…he turned into a beautiful butterfly”
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