My life should
Yes, sometimes I have to laugh at all the stuff that happens to me. When I tell people, they can’t believe all that crap can happen to one person, yeah I feel the same way and it’s my life.
So many people only see the amazing in my life, the trips, the parties, the fun life I lead, that is because I don’t whine or cry about the stuff that comes at me. I don’t go around and say “oh poor me, this happened, that happened, my life sucks”
No, I deal with it with a smile and I keep going along with my day. So of course you think my life is a bed of roses obviously minus the thorns you don’t see.
But if you are truly my friend you know the crap I’ve dealt with throughout my life and even recently, as the storms have been coming fast and hard at me.
These last few weeks alone, I lost my job, my client owes me 1,800, my daughter who’s bills I’ve been paying for the last 5 months while she’s been unemployed refused to help me when my car broke down and I threw her out.
I broke my ribs, my identity was stolen yet again and my computer crashed…
Again, this shit can only happen to me!
Yet through it all I was in a state of peace, I’ve spoke before about asking for peace recently as I have been off balance, I’ve have been stressed, I’ve been mad and angry and really not myself, I hated that feeling, see even through all my bad times, I’ve always had my peace but recently it was gone and I needed it back.
This last year while being incredible has also been trying… I had my heartbroken, I ended two friendships, one with who I thought was my “Guardian angel” because of the money he owes me, the other because “I was spiritual enough” whatever the hell that means.
I lost my best friend at 52, I had my identity stolen.
I’ve been working 12 hours a day for months trying to help my daughter without a job pay her bills, my house was broken into while we were on a cruise, which took me months to pay for and all my daughter and her best friend did was fight on.
I had my house flooded and my cars busted from the hurricane and I am still fighting the insurance company for the money….yes, it’s been a hell of a year…
But I chose to focus on the good things, the trips, the friends, my church and my church family, the good times…hell if I didn’t tell you, you would have never guess I was going through all of that.
And this is why people talk about my faith, how can I still have faith when all that crap is coming at me? It’s because I know God has me, this is just a test for my testimony, this is making me stronger, teaching me lessons I need to learn.
Lessons to never give up, to keep believing even when I can’t see the sun. It has taught me to be grateful for all I have and from where I’ve come from because as bad as it is, I know what worst looks like.
Yes, I am human and sometimes I have a pity party, I cry and ask God Why? When will it be my season? But in the morning I put back on my big girl panties and stick that smile on my face and grab my faith again while I walk out that door to do another 12 hour shift.
See one day I will be telling this to the world, to millions of others who might be going through the same situation and don’t think they can make it, one day I hope to inspire others to say if she can do it, so can I.
To show others that it’s okay to show that your human, to make mistakes, to fall on your face and pick losers. That doesn’t make you a loser that makes you a survivor! It makes you a teacher, a person who is not afraid to inspire others with their failure.
That my friends, is a real living, breathing human being.
So today my friends remember even when your life seems like a sitcom, even when your thinking #thisshitonlyhappenstome
There is always tomorrow…
The sun will always shine after a storm. There is always a testimony from your test…you just have to laugh your way through.
“Be the change you want to see”
“And just when the caterpillar thought his life over…he turned into a beautiful butterfly”
My book The blessing in Disguise
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