Treadmill Treats Monday Message
Praying for a man he has for me..
I have been divorced for 4 years, I was separated for 2 before that. I didn’t date all through the separation as I needed to work on me and I needed to forgive him for his part.
I needed this space to find me again and believe me, it was amazing. When I got divorced I wanted to feel like a women again, I wanted to feel attractive, I wanted to know I still had it.
Prideful? Yes, but after 24 years of put downs, of telling you time and time again, that you are worthless, that no one would ever want you besides him, you yearn to hear something from someone. That your pretty, that you are a strong, intelligent, capable women.
I dated alittle, I met a man who was alot younger, who was great but who wanted more than I could give, as I’ve been there, done that.
When I reconnected with an old ex I fell hook, line and sinker. He told me all I wanted to hear he wined and dined me, he made me feel like a princess and then he turned out to be the world’s biggest con artist.
I decided I was not dating anyone, not dinner, not drinks not anything for a year. I worked on my book, spent all my time with my girls, prayed to learn to forgive yet again.
Yet in all this time I never asked, I never prayed about a man, not once in all of my tithes, twice a week did I ever speak of a man.
I prayed about my girls, my book, my blog, my business, about a home, about my friends, about forgiveness but never once about a man.
I was hurt, I have been hurt so many times in my life by men.
I was doing me and I was good with that fact.
When I met my next one he also was an ex I dated in high school ( Note to self…no more dating ex’s!!)
I thought he was sweet and kind but I was cautious, I was not throwing it all in the ring like the last one. And then there were the warning flags yet again, these flags that I chose to ignore in all the men I date.
It turns out he was another version of my ex husband, narcissistic, passive aggressive and controlling. I was out of there, I am stupid but not that stupid that I needed a repeat performance.
So at this point, I would like to find a man to share my life with. My girls are grown now, will be starting their own lives soon.
I have an amazing life and would like to share it with someone but not just anyone, it has to be who God has chosen for me.
So recently I started to ask,
I’ve been putting it on my prayer request, I put it on my vision board, I am praying on it and just like always, my God has jokes.
He is bringing me jokers, horrible dates, men with issues, boys who play games. Oh yeah, fun times for me but I know now that I put this in his hands, now that I gave it to him, he will take care of it. Just like he’s taken care of everything else in my life.
I will keep praying, I will keep asking, I will keep dating, (Hello! I need material for my blog) but I will no longer worry, he has this, he has me. He is the all mighty God, the God of impossible and the God of miracles (and after all the losers I’ve dated I need one!)
I put it out there and I will believe… so today my friends remember that sometimes we have to go through storms to appreciate the sun. You have to kiss alot of frogs to get your Prince. You have to pray, to put it out there, to believe even when it seems impossible…
Keep praying for the person he has for you…
“Be the change you want to see”
“And just when the caterpillar thought his life over…he turned into a beautiful butterfly”
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