The loss of a friend

The loss of a friend

This past weekend I had to  again say goodbye to another friend of mine. Another soul that was way too young, that was called home.

Sometimes you just think why God why? They were in the prime of their lives, they had children, families that needed them, why?

There are no answers that will make you feel better, no answers that will bring them back. This is just an ugly fact of life we all must live with.
I have lost many, many people I have loved in my life, at one point I thought I was cursed that so many people I loved died.

I’ve learned that we are not promised anything while we are here on this earth. We could be here a month, 10 years, or 100 years. We don’t get to pick the length, that is up to God.

We just need to know that God (or whoever is your higher power) has a plan for us while we are here. We have a purpose, we have a life that we need to make the most of.

We need to be grateful, we need to fulfill our calling, to help others, to be present in each moment, to live our lives to the fullest.
We need to stop complaining and stop whining about what we don’t have, where we aren’t at yet.

Do you think my friend I lost this weekend or my best friend I lost last year around this same time thought, “I should have checked social media more or I should have hung out with friends more?”

Do you think they said “Wow I should have stayed home and washed those clothes or I should have went to the beach when my kids asked me?”

Yes, things that seem so important aren’t when you look at the big picture, when you are counting the minutes you have left.

We would make totally different choices if we knew it would be our last day here. We would laugh more, take more time to stop and literally smell the roses, we would do what we love with who we love.

We wouldn’t be afraid to tell people how we truly feel because we aren’t  guaranteed to have another chance to do so.
Yes, we all would be living a different life if we knew our time was closing in on us.

But it is, time is closing in on us, we aren’t going to live forever. We don’t know if today is our last day, tomorrow or next week, so if we know that why aren’t we living our lives to the fullest? Because we think we have plenty of time, soon, next week, next year, when I meet someone, when I get that promotion,  when I lose that 20 pounds…
So many excuses, so much wasted time…

I always look for a lesson in my pain and what I have learned in losing so many loved ones is that I don’t take a second for granted. I tell the people I love that I love them every day, every time I speak to them. I tell them I am proud of them, that they are special, I stop what I am doing to spend time with them. I live in the moment, I leave the laundry and the dishes to be with them.

I’ve learned that time is precious and I want to make the most of every second I am giving. I want to go home with no regrets, I want to go home empty because I gave it my all. I want people to say when they put me to rest that she live her life large!
But most of all I want to hear God tell me “Well done my child, well done”

So as I said goodbye to another beautiful soul who I was blessed to have in my life, I know it’s not the last time I will see her. I know she is in a better place, that she is not suffering anymore, that she is home just waiting for me and her other loved ones.This picture gives me peace and help me here to cope with another loss.

Demetria Willliams you will be missed by so many people, but we know you will be smiling down on all of us still here.

“Be the change you want to see”

“And just when the caterpillar thought his life over…he turned into a beautiful butterfly”

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