The value of friendship

The value of friendship

These last few years have taught me a lot of things,  especially things that opened my eyes about friendships.

If you read my blog or you know me, you know that I’m a friend for life. Growing up as an only child, friends were the family that I chose for myself, the brothers and the sisters that I long for.

I chose these friends and I held onto these friendships for the last 40 plus years. I’m not talking about “Facebook friends” I’m talking about real friends, that call each other all the time, we visit each other, we’re part of each other’s lives on a daily basis, real life friends.

So for me these last few years that I have lost a lot of friends, have been hard.
I have realized that not everyone is who they say they are, that they paint one picture and then another one, later on emerges.
They are there for what they can get and when it no longer serves their needs, they are outta here.
They come to you with a big show, saying they are a true friend but when you are not receptive, they cut you off, just like that.

I look at my friendships like I look at my relationships, I work at them. If I was having a issue with a relationship I would talk to someone, I would tell them, you hurt my feelings, you did this or that to me, I am mad…whatever I may be feeling, I would sit down and let them know.
I want the relationship to work, maybe I said something, maybe I didn’t mean to come off like that so tell me, let me have it, but then give it a chance to be talked about, to resolve the issues, whatever they may be.

Don’t just shut me out without a word, who does that? Would you do that in a relationship? Are you trying to play games?
I am a grown ass women I don’t play games, if I am in a relationship or a friendship with you, I am going to try to work it out, because I love you and you obviously mean something to me, as you are in my life.

I don’t need fake friends, I had enough of them, enough backstabbing friends, friends who will do you wrong or leave you in times of need. I had friends who only called you for gossip or when they needed somwthing no, life is too short for that shit.

Either you know who I am or not, either you know I am a friend for life or there is the door, don’t let it hit you in the ass on the way out.

I will try to save a friendship but I will no longer beg or kiss someone’s ass to be my friend.
Those days are over, I have realized that not everyone is coming along for the whole ride and as much as that hurts, it’s okay…I want to know that the people in my boat are rowing and not drilling holes in it before we take off, before I make it big, before they get a free ride.

God has been shaking my tree alot, some people are the fruit and when you shake it, even just alittle they fall off. Some are the branches,  you need to shake alittle harder but they will break and drop off as well.
Some are the body of tree the are there for a long time even but when the really bad storms come, they will get knocked over.

And then there are the roots of the tree, that no matter what happens they are not going anywhere, they are there for life, they will always have your back, they are your anchor in the storms, all storms, you don’t even need to think, they are there.

God has put alot of storms in front of me, lot’s of test for my testimony, he has shook my tree and there have been times when I didn’t think I would survive but like that old oak tree, bruised and beat up, scarred and with lost limbs, it still stands tall.

I might have lost fruit, I may have lost branches, I may have even been knocked over a few times but I keep getting straighten out and standing back up and I know that my roots will keep holding me together.

So today my friends remember, I know what I bring to the table and I am not afraid to eat alone or with out you, I know I will still have the people who are my real friends sitting around the table with me.

I know this will not be my loss…I am on this journey with people who truly have my back and I, who has theirs. I am going big places and it’s a shame you won’t be on that journey with me but everything happens for a reason. I might not know the reason but God does, so I will trust him and keep that door shut.
As I realize the value of friendship even when others do not.

“Be the change you want to see”

“And just when the caterpillar thought his life over…he turned into a beautiful butterfly”

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