Your true colors
We all have true colors, we all have who we really are behind the mask we show to the world.
We all say, do as we say and not as we do, pretend we have it all together, that we are this type of person or that type of person, when are are not even close.
This is especially true for the dating world, where your putting out this image to try to find a partner. You said you weigh this or your pictures are way older than you say you are. You write you want a relationship when you are still broken or didn’t unpack from your last one.
You say your kind, yet you are rude to wait staff, you say you are generous, yet you never reach out to help anyone else out.
You say all kinds of things to build yourself up, trying desperately to catch a “fish”
Yet, when you finally meet someone, when you are in the getting to know you stage, your still holding on the facade, but you can only hold on to it for so long before it gets exhausting and you drop the mask.
It is then the true you emerges, the angry person, the hateful person, the hurt person who hurts people. Unfortunately for most of us, it is too late, we chose not to see the signs in the beginning or we try to only see the best in that person or maybe you let yourself go and fall in love with them and it’s too late.
Yes, once the mask is off, it’s on, they will let you know who they are, they will put you down, call you names, show that they are narcissistic or controlling. Maybe they are mean spirited or a wife beater or passive aggressive, whatever they truly are will come out for you to see.
And trust me it won’t be pretty and you will be shocked….or maybe not, because your intuition may have been telling you this all along.
For many of us who want to see the best in people, this really hurts us, we wanted them to be honest, to actually be who they said they were and we’re saddened that we are taken in yet again.
But I have been learning alot of lessons this year and one of them as I wrote about yesterday was don’t ignore the signs. There are always signs, you need to look for them, even the small ones will tell you something about a person because the small ones will eventually turn into the big ones.
Yes, it may taken me back that you could have spoken to me like that but to be honest I always knew you had it in you, you were just waiting for the right time to show who you truly are.
I am glad that it happened sooner than later when I was six feet in with my heart in my hand. I can walk away now saying “Dam I am getting better at this, I am not ignoring all the signs even if I ignored some of them”
I will never again wear a mask that I have wore for so many years in the past.
I am who I am warts and all.
I can’t pretend I am something I am not, I believe in fairy tales, I am brutally honest, I am quick to anger and quick to get over it. I love big, with my whole heart and know that life is too short not to jump in with both feet.
I will do anything for my friends and family but I will never be someone I am not, never again.
Yes, I will be fooled again, hurt again and maybe even have my heart broken yet again (Lord, I hope not) but even if I do, I will always be what you see is what you get, a in your face New Yorker who tells it like it is and never sugar coats shit.
So today my friends, remember you will eventuality see their true colors, you will know their real heart, you will see the flags much clearer and you too will be grateful that you listened, that you chose to walk away, that their true colors came out sooner than later.
Thank you for the lessons…for I am truly grateful for them as they are teaching me what I am willing to put up with and what says I’m outta here…
“Be the change you want to see”
“And just when the caterpillar thought his life over…he turned into a beautiful butterfly”
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The blessing in disguise…. revealed**
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